mu's world


Tuesday, April 19, 2005

One guess what I'm doing right now...

Damn, I'm bad.
Tonight was supposed to be my big night for writing and (hopefully) completing my paper. I don't think that will be happening unless something crazy happens right now. UGH...I get so mad at myself for this stuff.
I've written only a page and a half. Though...I've only really been in front of the computer for about an hour and a half. I think I'm just testing myself...Subconsciously.
This weekend was good (though unproductive in so many ways). Our friends living in Montana visited and we had a good time. Last night we went for dinner and had a sort of bonfire afterwards. It was real good and what I needed. Though it would be so much better if they hadn't left for that unforsaken state today. Hopefully they will be moving out to Eastern Standard Time soon. They are looking to "cash in" on some family land and possibly build a house on it. They still wouldn't be close, but they would be closer.
Other than that...not too much happened. We did a little moving and I tried to ignore the dates of this weekend, though as hard as that is.
Today I almost started crying at work. I saw the most precious baby sleeping in her stroller. She was adorable and for a moment I realized what we were missing out on. It hurt real bad and for a brief moment I almost felt as though I couldn't breathe. It really sucks sometimes.
I ended up telling my friend about our second miscarriage. I don't really like how I did it (after two gin and tonics), but I couldn't help it. It just came out. I suppose I needed to talk, to get it out. It did feel good to get it out.
Well...I need to get some more writing done. Desperately. Ugh.


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