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Wednesday, January 12, 2005

I'm good! I'm good!

It's done! It's over with. The HSG is a thing of the past. Hopefully I never need to have another one again.
Yesterday I ended up going into work for just under three hours in the morning before my appointment. That was a waste of my time because I was feeling stressed and irritable about my appointment. At noon, I was done and went back home to eat a light lunch and take my four Advil. Star was home (he's been fighting an upper respitatory infection for the last week) and was able to take me to my appointment (which was a very good thing in many ways). Fortunately, I was already pre-registered so I didn't have very much waiting to do. I got to experience a different part of the hospital (radiology) that I haven't previously experienced before. A very friendly tattooed (just on the back of her neck) nurse (I think) showed me to the little dressing area. It reminded me of a dressing room from a department store or something. She gave me my little johnny and "bathrobe" and I quickly changed and waited. Almost immediately a woman (I think she was an x-ray technician) opened a door to a crazy looking room with a big-ass machine. Everybody at the hospital was so friendly to me yesterday. It made a world of difference to me. Anyway, I went into the room and immediately saw my OB/gyn. She was very happy or something. She showed me all of the tools and explained what she was going to do. I was feeling a bit nervous. A pap smear is nothing to me. I don't even complain about those anymore because they are so minor. So...my Doc started the procedure, explaining everything as she did it. I started to cramp up almost right away. The longest part (though it was probably only 2 minutes) was waiting for the x-ray doctor (figures...a man) to come in to actually do the x-ray. While we were waiting for him, I was starting to get really uncomfortable. It was almost surreal. Maybe it was because I was getting kind of light-headed. I was in a lot of pain and I was on the table with a crazy machine over me. I've never, ever experienced any thing like that before. Finally the x-ray man came in and the monitor was turned on and was were I could see it too. Then...suddenly...my uterus was on the screen. Now...that was crazy. Up until this year...I have never had any health problems. I've never had a broken bone or even a cavity (until 6 months ago). So...until yesterday, I've never even seen any pictures of my insides before. I think it freaked me out a little bit. A couple of times, I had turn away from the screen because doubled with the pain of the cramps...it was almost too much for me to take at once. Anyhow...the actual x-ray part of the thing only last for a minute. My doctor was saying some things that I couldn't hear, but the x-ray-technician-woman next to me kept turning to me to say, "that's good, that's very good." So...though I was in some pain...I felt good. My Doc said that there were no blockages or openings and that my tubes looked good and thin, and clear.
So...as I felt kind of headachy and crampy as hell, I walked out of the hospital feeling good knowing that as of right now, my uterus and tubes are in good shape. It's an amazingly good feeling. It's such a relief. A month ago I didn't think we would ever know why I had the miscarriages, and I kind of didn't want to find out why. I was afraid. But...I think for now we have some sort of answer. I guess we won't really know for sure until we try again. And for now we aren't.
Thank you Crista for thinking of me yesterday. Thank you also for warning me too. Your positive vibes helped. I'm not used to having cramps, so when I actually got them yesterday, they were more than I planned. But I'd do it again to be told that everything "looks good".

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